The arguing came back too. She fights with me about everything again. I let her win sometimes just to hear it.

But here’s what I don’t say out loud.

I’m still up at three some mornings. Not for the baby. He sleeps fine now.

I just lie there thinking about that flat little voice on the phone. All those months I called it nothing. Richard heard it too and called it nothing. And the only reason my girl got out is that a guilty man finally found his conscience. Not because her own mother walked in sooner.

Mia tells me I saved her. She really believes it.

I just hold Noah and let her think it. It’s the one lie in all of this I’m willing to keep telling.